Domestic Violence: A Necessary Recap of the Basics

October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month.   In spite of the help and information available to victims of domestic violence, and the increased awareness by law enforcement about what abuse looks like and how to address it, domestic violence has not disappeared.  It therefore bears repeating what many already know about this topic and some of the legal remedies available to victims.  If this information causes even one victim to seek a way out of an abusive relationship, then the repetition is invaluable.

Domestic violence does not always look the way that one might think, and its victims do not either.  Family law attorneys see abuse in all forms, physical, emotional and financial, and in victims from every race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation and socioeconomic group.  At its core, domestic violence is an abuse of power in an intimate relationship.

In the media, domestic violence is generally portrayed as physical abuse.  In reality, domestic abuse takes on more subtle forms just as often.  All domestic abuse creates a power imbalance between the abuser and the victim, which can have a long-term adverse impact on everyone living in the same household as the abuser.  That is especially true for children who witness domestic violence.

Physical Abuse

Physical abuse does not always cause black eyes and bruises. Many abusers seek to maintain control over their victims long-term and any obvious physical signs of abuse on a victim may prevent this. For example, pinning a victim in place, or placing hands around a victim’s neck, is abuse, even if these acts leave no physical evidence. Any physical interaction which causes physical harm, or causes a victim to feel threat of physical harm, is abuse. In a family law proceeding, these actions are a basis for a victim to seek and obtain an Order of Protection against an abuser. A judge can issue an Order of Protection without prior notice to the abuser where the victim can show that notice would place her in danger of further harm. A lack of physical evidence does not mean that abuse did not occur, and credible allegations of abuse can lead to serious consequences for an abuser.

Emotional Abuse

Berating and name-calling are also forms of abuse, particularly if these behaviors occur repeatedly.  Other forms of emotional abuse are threats of harm to the victim or someone she cares about.  Emotional abuse can be insidious; a victim may not realize she is a victim until a family member, friend or attorney highlights the abuse.  Victims of emotional abuse are often reticent to report it, even though courts can issue Orders of Protection based on credible claims of emotional abuse.