May 6, 2021

Parent’s Day Wish List

As we approach our second Mother’s Day (and soon enough our second Father’s Day) in this COVID world, mothers and fathers everywhere are undoubtedly exhausted this year. What a 14 months it has been. Whether it’s the heartbreak we feel as we watch death tolls around the world keep ticking upwards, the communal outrage and empathy we feel when another child is taken from the world too soon, the constant feeling of being spread too thin, the fears we have for our children and loved ones or the guilt we feel when we retreat for a moment’s silence and respite.

This year has been hard for intact families even where spouses can lean on one another for support. The toll on split-household families is almost unimaginable: no built in wingman and instead, ex-spouses or significant others with whom you cannot communicate, new spouses or significant others whose views and positions don’t necessarily align with your own, learning how to navigate remote schooling, virtual schedules, quarantine restrictions, and work from home over multiple households. Any one of these things could drive a parent to a breaking point.

So this year, more so than ever, on the eve of Mother’s Day, perhaps we could all benefit from the following reminders:

Do the right thing. Help your child draw the card. Buy the bunch of flowers or box of chocolates. Smile at the drop-off. Say thank you.
Honor all the “Moms” and “Dads” in your child’s life whether it be the ex-spouse, the new step-parent, the estranged grandma or grandpa, the fun aunt or uncle, or any number of surrogates who play a role in your children’s lives. Take advantage of this new age of video-chat!
Closet the resentment (for at least a day). Lead by example for your children. Resentment only breeds resentment.
Stop counting the minutes and days “lost”. Appreciate the time gained over the last year.
Be flexible – life is all about the pivot.
It took two to tango. You wouldn’t have the joy (and agony) of parenthood if it weren’t for them.
Put aside the guilt and feel proud of everything you’ve managed to juggle over the last year and pay kudos to your spouse, ex-spouse, new spouse even if it pains you to do so!
Make new traditions. You might not have the extended family brunch anymore but doesn’t a home-made hodge-podge breakfast sound equally good?!
Know your child will love you regardless….

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Parent’s Day Wish List

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