The Need For Mental Health Professionals in Divorce

Early on in my relationship with new clients who are starting the divorce process, I often  inquire whether or not they are seeing a therapist.  If the answer is no, I regularly encourage my clients  to consider meeting with a therapist.   Generally speaking, I look at this as something positive  I can do for someone who is just starting out through the often stressful and usually emotional process of divorcing.  While this is sometimes a difficult conversation for a lawyer to have with a new client, many  are very appreciative. Usually sooner than later, they do seek out a therapist, who ends up being someone they can  lean on for emotional support as they wade through this process.  Most important, however, is that the clients know that they have someone that they can feel absolutely safe telling anything and everything to, as the therapist/patient relationship is entirely confidential.

It is a very different situation, however, when the issue of seeing a therapist comes up during the process of a divorce, usually during a custody dispute. In those cases, a therapeutic professional is appointed by the court to evaluate a family and make recommendations concerning their future custodial arrangements.  This therapist, who is usually selected by the children’s lawyer, is viewed as the court’s witness and is someone very different from a personal therapist.

When I have clients who are ordered to see a court appointed therapist, I explain before the meeting with this professional that nothing they say is “confidential”.  I tell them that although this person will likely have a tremendous impact on their future custodial arrangements, they must carefully think about their conversations with this therapist, as anything they say will likely be disclosed to everyone involved in the case, including the court.